Family Guy Season 5 Episode Guide
Family Guy’s fifth season first aired on the Fox network in eighteen episodes from September 10, 2006 to May 20, 2007 before being released as two DVD box sets and in syndication. It premiered with the episode “Stewie Loves Lois” and finished with “Meet the Quagmires”. The Family Guy series follows the dysfunctional Griffin family-father Peter, mother Lois, daughter Meg, son Chris, baby Stewie and Brian, the family pet, who reside in their hometown of Quahog. The executive producers for the fifth season were David Goodman, Chris Sheridan, Danny Smith and series creator Seth MacFarlane. The showrunner for the fifth season was Goodman.
Stewie Loves Lois
When Lois saves his beloved teddy bear, Rupert, Stewie starts to think that maybe he shouldn’t kill his dear old mom and clings to her like a baby blanket. However, Stewie’s change in demeanor doesn’t go over well with Lois and she gets sick of all his loving attention. Meanwhile, Peter undergoes a prostate exam and thinks his doctor is molesting him.
Mother Tucker
Peter’s mom starts dating TV anchor Tom Tucker, causing Peter to turn to him as the father figure he always wanted. And Brian and Stewie begin hosting their own raunchy radio program.
Hell Comes to Quahog
Meg takes a job at the local “superstore,” but the store causes Peter to lose his job and his electricity. So he becomes the store’s most vocal critic – until it offers him a job. Brian and Stewie decide to take matters into their own hands in order to save the town from the corporate giant.
Saving Private Brian
Stewie and Brian join the army, go through basic training, and are sent to Iraq where they try everything possible to get an honorable discharge. Meanwhile, Chris becomes the lead singer of a rock band until Peter and Lois get Marilyn Manson to talk him out of it.
Whistle While Your Wife Works
Lois does Peter’s work at the brewery while he recovers from getting his fingers surgically reattached. Meanwhile, when Stewie discovers that Brian is dating a very attractive but intellectually challenged girl named Jillian, he tries to convince Brian to break up with her, but Brian can’t close the deal because she is so hot.
Prick Up Your Ears
Lois becomes the high school sex ed teacher, but is fired for having “radical” views. So she is replaced by a Christian group that uses fear, misinformation and lies to promote abstinence. Meanwhile, Meg and her new guy take an abstinence pledge, but still manage to find a loophole. And a terrified Stewie sets a series of traps for the Tooth Fairy, hell-bent on destroying him.
Chick Cancer
Stewie tries to win over a retired child actress, and Peter becomes a fan of “chick movies” and makes his own. Meanwhile, Lois introduces Peter to chick flicks, and he decides to make his own movie based on the plots of every girly movie ever made.
Barely Legal
Meg can’t find a date to her junior prom, and even though he is dating Jillian, Brian ends up going with Meg. At the prom, Brian gets drunk to make the night pass, but ends up making out with Meg. Meg begins to think of Brian as her boyfriend and becomes obsessed with spending every moment with him. Meanwhile, Peter, Cleveland and Quagmire join the police force to help Brian.
Road to Rupert
Brian sells Rupert at a garage sale. Stewie, who is upset with Brian, takes him cross country to Colorado to find his beloved teddy, and ends up having a ski-off to win back Rupert. Meanwhile, Peter loses his license, so Meg has to drive him around.
Peter’s Two Dads
After Peter’s dad, Francis, dies, he finds out from Thelma that his real father lives in Ireland. So Peter and Brian head there in search of his father, who ends up being the town drunk, which is a great honor, and he challenges him to a drinking game to prove his paternity. Meanwhile, Stewie acts out and Lois spanks him, but he quickly realizes that he likes it and does whatever he can to get into trouble.
The Tan Aquatic with Steve Zissou
Peter becomes the neighborhood bully after trying to take care of Chris’s bully, and Stewie has a cancer scare after staying in the tanning bed too long. Stewie gets sunburned and fears he has cancer. While waiting for the results of his cancer screening, Stewie begins to live his life as if he had only days to live and drives Brian crazy with his demands.
Airport ’07
Peter becomes a redneck and gets Quagmire fired. So the gang sets out to get Quagmire his job back. When the plan flops, Quagmire receives advice from his idol, Hugh Hefner, which leads him to save the day.
Bill and Peter’s Bogus Journey
Peter’s attempts to become physically fit lead to a friendship with Bill Clinton, which inadvertently nearly destroys Peter & Lois’ marriage. Meanwhile, Lois and Stewie try to potty-train Brian.
No Meals on Wheels
After Peter finds a valuable coin and sells it for $50,000, he and Lois open their own restaurant. Peter is dismayed, however, when Joe and all of his handicapped friends begin using the restaurant as their hangout, and bans them all. This leads to a huge showdown and an ironic fate for Peter.
Boys Do Cry
The family heads to church when Lois gets a gig as the organist, but after Stewie gets sick the congregation is convinced he’s possessed by the devil. So, the family goes on the run and ends up in Texas. Peter fits right in with the cowboys, Stewie enters the “Little Miss Texas” pageant and Chris and Meg sneak into George W. Bush’s house.
No Chris Left Behind
When Chris gets expelled from school, the family enrolls him in a snooty boarding school Mr. Pewterschmidt attended, but Chris doesn’t exactly fit in. Meanwhile, the chicken returns to pick a fight with Peter, but you’ll never guess how it all ends.
It Takes a Village Idiot, and I Married One
When Lois runs for mayor of Quahog, she isn’t the front-runner until she “dumbs down” her political views. Once in office, she’s corrupted by the power and starts accepting bribes so that she can buy herself expensive trinkets. Meanwhile, Peter’s enjoying being the “first lady” and all of the perks that go along with it.
Meet the Quagmires
Death grants Peter’s wish of going back in time to be 18 again just for one night so that he can sow his wild oats. In 1984, he bails on a date with Lois to go to a bar and make out with a movie actress, but when he returns to the present, he discovers that he is now married to the former starlet and Lois is with Quagmire. Meanwhile, Stewie, Chris and Meg have all inherited Quagmire’s charming characteristics.